| and 3 o'clock comes around.... |
[08 Dec 2004|04:57pm] |
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well, I'm feeling much better about things now.
..Earlier.. I was feeling pretty shit..
Mainly coz my 'story' I was writing for my very own comic book series wasnt working as I had hoped.. infact it pretty much sucks.. I have had a mental block for like 3 months..
Occasionally getting a burst of creativity and then it dying on its arse..
But you know what, I dont need to rush it out. I'm not inspired right now. Not for my own story, and I'm not good at writing.. I have no idea what I'm doing..
I got an e-mail last week about a book thats coming out that needed an artist.. The synopsis sounded kinda interesting, but I wasnt sure.. Today I just read the first issue's script.
I'm in love with it.
Hence why I feel alot better. I'm going to work my butt of with freelance stuff for half of next year, then work on the 4 issues of this series, which will come out 2006.
(providing it all goes ahead.) This is a big relief for me. Ive been stressing about what to do for a while now.
Comics is risky business. Especially when they cant pay you until profits are made.. Thats why I will work alot, and be able to support myself for the next half of the year..
mm. Anyway. I love Wendy.. have I mentioned that before? ha! *sigh* :)
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[07 Dec 2004|10:43am] |
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zzZzZZ
Today I woke up at 4am for no reason.
And couldnt get to sleep for quite sometime.
Then I woke up at 10. and now I am sleepy.
I want to hurry up and find a place to live. We really want this awesome place on cranbourne rd, but I'm worried that I wont be able to afford it.. gah, I wish my parents would help me out a bit, theyre like not helping at all.. I mean, Ive never done anything like this before.. a little support would be nice. :/
In other news, took wendy to spencer street yesterday to see her home, but we went for a little shopping first. Bought some stuff in minotaur, ventured to missing link and then headed to the sofotel .. ok I spelt that totally wrong. But nevertheless its a ritzyhotel wendy got to stay in for her seminar thing.. anyway were gunna get a room on valentines day and be rich yuppies for the night hahaha.,
We had a look around teh place, and she wanted to show me the glass elevator.. which was coiol.. until we went underground and then got STUCK... :|
Ok, so it was only for a bout a minute but u know me, I freak out easily.
It was hot and gross yesterday. I hate that kind of heat.
I think I've quit smoking aboiut 15 times within the least 2 months.
I'll try again after this pack.. *rolles eyes*
I'm desperately trying to figure out what I'm going to be working on next year. It's really starting to bother me. Mainly because I need to afford rent for our new place..
But I want to do comic books.. and Ive had a few offers but argh.. I just need to work it out. I just wanna do something.
Wendy and I did one of those silly photo id things.. they look very silly mainly coz neither of us was ready for any of the photos.. we look like blind dear in truck headlights, oblivious. heheh.
Well there was one good photo anyway..
Apparently her ex wants her back now that he's seen us togethor.. pfft.. go away u silly man! Go have a cry.. and then etheres this fucker who keeps msging her nasty shit.. he's sent like 15 msg's within the last month or something and she hasnt even replied to any of them and hes still doing it.. god that shits me, coz it upsets her.. fucker :/
umm anywayI should probably eat breakfast. :)
bubyez.
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[18 Nov 2004|09:06pm] |
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Im in a good mood today, I feel like having a beer but I have none. damn.
Cordial will have to do.
Oh I love this new bouncing souls cd.. especially Sing along forever..
u may have heard it, they play it on the radio sometimes.. mmm.. such a cool song yes.
Today I worked on more of my story, its coming along very slowly.. I keep getting distractions.. like.. spending time with wendy, or work or family stuff.. all of which I'm fine with.. I just need some time to really get going with it.
Its a dream I've had for such a long time.. I need to get going with it, make it really good. I am excited about it. :)
Been thinking about moving out lately, I really want to do it. Get somewhere nice. Start fresh.
This room just reminds me of the last 2 years of depression.. ack.. It'll do for now I suppose.
So its our one month on saturday, I'm not sure what were doing exactly.. but it I'm sure it will be nice. As usual. :)
Will be heading up to ballarat early saturday morning..
Going to stu's tomorrow night for drinks that should be cool, havent seen him in a while.. its in honour of him finishing uni, which is super duper cool.
I purchased www.angrypants.com the other week. At the moment it just links to the normal site.. (the one with nothing new on it.) But I'm hoping to get a new design going.. with new comics.. and a bit of a 'blog' ... argh. I just have so many things I want to do.. and not enough time to do them in.
Its kind of weird when you go to somewhere like ballarat.. and meet people who know who you are, and then say its an honour to meet you.
I'm just not used to it. And I still have no idea how to react.. I'm no rockstar.. I'm just little old me.
I went into tafe with wendy the other day, just to have a look at the place see if its changed or anything.. saw one of my teachers, he's really cool.. he seemed happy for me, with work and the girlfriend.. ive changed so much since I was there. For the better.
I was really unmotivated with my art back then.. my mind was stuck in a bad relationship, but since then ive got my head togethor.. realised whats actually important.
I think im going to play some vice city now. :)
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[13 Nov 2004|03:41pm] |
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mm, blue and whiteness.
I'm very bored.. I'm anxiously waiting 6 pm when I can see my girl.. but its like 3 hours away.. argh.. what shall I do?!
Yesterday went into the city with chris, saw shelley on the train, so then we did a bit of shopping.. well for chris anyway.. *burp*
Then we met stacey dave and flea in bar and bistro.. the place never loses its class hehe..
Anyway was cool catchin up with stacey, and if u read this I hope you have an awesome time in th UK and canada, I'm sure will. :)
Did some more work for xbox magazine, another 2 page illustration.. and I had basically a day to do it.. met the deadline thankfully and all is well.
I love xbox jobs.. I really do! Pays nicely, and its not full on.
I bought Halo 2 yesterday, chris came back to mine for a bit of a deathmatch.. which was pretty hilarious.. then we co-op'ed till 2 am.. and my eyes started to go on me.
Nice game.. but the single player campaign is so much like the original its kind of boring. It has its moments tho..
I havent even finished doom 3 which I bought the other week.. I really need to play it on a better pc tho.
Which I'm thinking I might get a new one.. ive had this for nearly 3 years.. would I be insane to get a brand new top of the range pc? I can claim it on tax?
I think I will.. This computar needs more RAM and a much bigger hard drive anyway. But then I have to figure out what to do with this one. cripes.
Thats it for now.
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| ickey ishecream... |
[10 Nov 2004|09:42pm] |
Been crazy times,....
Friday:
Went to soveriegn hill in Ballarat with the folks and the relatives from england.. I felt guilty for being sick for a whole week so I thought Id come along and spend some time with them.. plus.. its in ballarat.. which means a free lift to visit Wendy :D
We got fish n chips and few drinks.. and just stayed at home being really silly heheh.... *cough*.. heh..
Saturday:
We got another free lift back to frankston with her parents who were visiting relatives in Mornington.. they had a huge cat.. which was bigger than the dogs. It liked me.. and made mu jumper very cat like.
It was Auntie Joan and Uncle Franks last night in victoria so we went out for chinese.. wendy was looking so pretty too.. :O :)
It was so cool having her there with me.. usually at these silly family dinner crappy things, its pretty boring and I always get annoyed coz I didnt have a 'partner' .. but yeh.. it was just really awesome.. even tho mum got drunk and embarressed me.. the whole thing was hilarious.. Had a great time.
Sunday:
Lazy day.. Hired Shrek 2 and some xbox games which werent very good.. ate popcorn .. twas cute.
Monday:
Time for Wendy to go home.. But she convinced me to come with her, hehe..
We walked around Melbourne for a bit, I bought her a couple of Living Dead dolls that she liked.... I hate going to minotaur and not buying anything.. its just annoying.. so thats my excuse :)
...Then headed for Ballarat.. and I was tired.. so I continud to be sleepy on the train listeinging to my ipod.. while she played about 5 games of solitaire on it.. and didnt win any... i wanna know what happens when u win!.. and it sucks coz Ive forgotten how to play it .. and im too lazy to learn..
We decided to stay at her parents place, mainly to see the cool house.. its a really old school.. like.. late 1800's or something crazy like that.. its a little spooky.. but its very cool.
Its about 35 minutes or so from Ballarat.. just hills around n stuff.. pretty peaceful.
We stood outside for a little bit looking at the sky.. iuts just so amazingly awesome out there.. you can see.. everything.. Ive never seen that many stars in my life..
We both saw a cool shooting star too haha awww...
Then she stepped in dog poo and that was funny.. coz we were wondering what stunk for a while. haha...
But its all good.
Her parents totally heard us that night.. aww.. how embarressing. They even commented the next mornhing.. "you were up late last night talking werent you.." ARGHJHHH!!.. *cough*
Anyway I'll leave the rest up to the imagination.
Tuesday:
We got a lift back into town, had a shower at her place and headed off to get our lip piercings.. i was paranoid for a while but then I kinda just wanted to get it over with.. and bahh.. its so not painful at all.. I dont know what i was stressing about.. im sucha sook.. Wendy got hers in the middle.. looks pretty cool.. but I cant kiss her properly yet :(
Stayed at her place again, got some more drinks, and just talked n shit with her friends.. then went to sleep hoorah!
Wednesday: Woke up... came home... lip feels odd... i want it to hurry up and feel normal... im tired as hell... I have no real work to do.. kind of..
I came home to 1 email.. ONE EMAIL.. how dissapointing. and it was spam too. bleh.
Like I said.. crazy times.. now I'm going to bed..
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[02 Nov 2004|10:38am] |
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So Last week I was really sick.. with a certain something which I wont mention coz its kind of embarressing ha!..
but anyway.. it really sucked.. what made it worse was we had relatives come over from england on monday,
and coz this sickness was in my mouth.. eck.. I was really anti-social.. I felt like a bastardio.
But anyway I hadnt seen Wendy, for like a week so she came round, and made me feel heeeaaappsss better whooohoo :P
And now I think its going away.. which is good coz the relatives are going back on sunday, and I need to be social.. plus I have work due on friday.. and fuck im just so sick of being sick.
But anywayz. I'm excited. :)
This summer is going to be the best summer ever. I'm gunna be working on my story alot more hopefully.. its coming along nicely, and I really enjoy it.. work is pretty cool coz I dont have heaps on.. I have a girlfriend now.. and she is like.. all i could ever ask for... and moreso. And I'm gunna be starting a proper band hopefully..
I feel alive when I'm around her.. As corny as all this is going to sound. I dont care.. my journal.
She makes my answerless questions go away.. u know the ones.
well anyway, today I gotta do some drawing.. and maybe some of my story.. but first I need some toast, and brekky juice.
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| 355 |
[23 Oct 2004|08:34am] |
.. And when you least expect it, someone comes along and makes your heart beat again.
I havent felt this way in a long time. You spend three days with someone and feel like you have known them forever.
The whole thing is very surreal.. well.. I better clean this room before she comes round. :)
hmm, Happiness.. been a long time since Ive seen it.
*sigh*
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| onto the next chapter... |
[20 Sep 2004|12:05pm] |
Im back!
It feels good to be home, but the whole thing just feels like one very long dream I had. infact, sitting here now typing this still feels like a dream.
Not sure exactly where my head is at yet.. Im still adjusting to the different time zone.
I landed at 4.30 am on saturday.. slept most of the day, then went out on the town with jimbo. Funny bastard he is.. uhh anyway ended up doing an all nighter.. I cant beleive I fuckin did it.. without falling asleep and dieing. came home on the first train.. got home bout 8 am or so.. slept all day .. blah blah.. yeh so like I said.. im still not properly aquinted with this side of the world.
But its good to be home.
There are a few things I need to do to move on in my life. Not easy things for me to do. In fact extremely difficult.. But Ive been throuigh alot already. So I must do them.
And then I can look forward to the rest of my life. Lean back, kick up the feet and just see what happens in life.
Im trying to quit smoking.. I kind of started quite bad again while I was away.
So now its cold turkey time.
Stone henge would only be good if I could sit there by myself for 3 hours.
Tourists suck. (does that include me?)
I went to London all by myself. Im such a big boy. Hour and a half on the train.
It was good to get away from everything for the day, I went to the camden town market. Nice place. :surreal:
I turnt 21.. yet I still get confused for a teenager.. maybe I should grow a beard.. And maybe not.
I'm looking forward to summer.
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| way away, away from here. |
[06 Aug 2004|10:36am] |
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Thought I might update for once.
You think since I'm always on the internet I'd update more often. *shrug*
Well, there is 1 week and 5 days until I leave for England.
That is good and bad.. I ordered a whole stack of clothes from interpunk that I wanted to arrive before I leave.. Yep you guessed; so I actually have some sort of clothing variety to choose from and wear. I find it unlikely they will be able to get it here in 1 week and 5 days. fuck.
So the plan is;
-get on a plane
-freak out about being on a plane.. maybe chuck in a few seizures aswell
-repeat "Iam cornholio teepee for your bunghole!" with my shirt over my head to entice passengers.
-get drunk on the plane and try and play the playstation.. fall asleep.. then have sex with an air stewerdess.. a hot one. in the toilet.(hey i worked for picture magazine, these sorts of fantasies are now implanted in my noggin)
-hope the plane doesnt crash.
-land in london..
-admire the airport.. for some reason i like airports *shrug*
-aunty sue and mick pick us up and take us back to theres where we will stay there for about 4 days or so.. i think. dunno..
-procede to stay at my nans house for a few weeks.
-visit stonehenge
-visit a castle.. yeh!
-visit the house I grew up in.
-see all my cousins and relatives yay!
-go to london to meet Laura and then procede to buy things that i probably dont need, plus clothes and crap.. and generally just be in london with a cute ass girl by my side. *sigh* :)
ah.. im sure theres heaps of stuff I will do.. cant think at the moment.. plus I need a shower.. and gotta finish this pinup by like.. 5 pm or some shit..
That is unless the art director dude doesnt email me.. if he doesnt then fuck him and his deadlines :)
Dead@17:Rough Cut went in stores a couple of days ago...
It kinda sucks that I dont actually have my won copy yet.. PLEASE COME TODAY... damn post office.. or fedex.. someones gunna pay...
Nevertheless, I read a review on the book the other night... * :O * <-- that was my expression. Read it and you will understand why.
http://www.paperbackreader.com
*under august 4th, dead@17:rough cut
I cant wait to get out of here.
I spoke to ellie the other night.. it was strange.. its strange how things turn out..
Just strange and thats about all I can say.. Falling in love is stupid..
I'm really just happy being by myself right now.
Lesson learned?
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| hey.. fancy seeing you here... |
[23 Jun 2004|07:00pm] |
aha!......
The last couple of weeks have been very crazy.
Let me rephrase; the last few months have been fucking crazy.
So much work.. ive been working alll say and then all night until 5 am to meet deadlines. Its really starting to take its toll.. especially on my eyes..
They fucking kill. But anyway.. its ok, coz all the hard stuff is over, Ive completed my short story for Viper Comics.. and it looks good.. could have been better.. but everythings just been so crazy I ran out of time and just had to get it done the best I could.. Cant wait till its printed tho.. its going to be awesome.
8 weeks until I go to england. My goodnes.. I cannot wait. Its going to be one of those life altering experiences. As tarot reading said a while ago.. abrupt change and time of liberation. I see it coming.. after all this hard work.. I can finally escape all this bullshit and maybe find myself again. Thats presuming I ever knew myself in the first place. Who can tell thee days,
You''ll have to excuse my typos I cant quite see what I'm typing.. jeez.. i guess thats a bad sign isnt it.. fuck.
Well. I've had a job offer in brisbane. I shouldsnt be shocked.. because I was told by the psychic I went to see.. she told me I would get an opputunity to go to queensland.. I laughed it off at the time.. im like yeh right. But here it is.. I could be living there. Its very strange how things are starting to pan out. Its like all of a sudden everything just happens and you dont seem to have much control over what happens. I read somewhere that its called fate. Hard to say.. I have no distinct opinions on fate or free will. I dont know the truth yet.
The truth of the matter is, Ive been depressed for the last.. fuck.. I dont know. 5 years or so. Its been quite a battle.. and I havent one yet.
But I'm hoping with this new change, and exciting things that are to come that maybe, I might feel 'right' in my own skin again. And not want to just sleep forever and not wake up.
Oh. I had a lucid dream the other night. My hair was the wrong colour.. and I realised I was dreaming.. the experience was uncanny. And then I decided to melt into the mirror and float through the wall in my bathroom.
Anyway, Back to walking the path.
355.
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[01 Jun 2004|06:11pm] |
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My flight is booked! w00t!
I leave for England, on Wednesday the 18th of August at 4.15 in the arvo :)
And will land in London on the 19th at 6.20 am.. which consequently is my 21st birthday!
Hmm British airways... I think they have screens on the back of the seats... and like.. playstation 2's.. or something.. That'd be hella neat.
I havent been on a plane since I was 6, so I'm sure its gotta heaps cooler..
For some reason I really like airports, asnd over the past 14 years ive been there alot for relatives coming over to visit, nad yay now im finally actually going somwhere.
I cant wait to get out of this country.
Im starting to get excited now.. :|
I'll be there for 4 weeks, should be cool.
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| yeah. |
[25 May 2004|11:09pm] |
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Dunno.. got a bit bored..
I havent sketched in along time too.. so.. yeh.. just trying not to lose it.
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[24 May 2004|07:09pm] |
I got a parcel from the xbox lads today.. yay for parcels.. make me feel like its christmas or something..
They sent me like 3 copies of each mag i had work in.. which was cool.. but now I have a lot of useless demo disks..
I should buy an xbox me thinks... cant afford it yet tho.. gotta pay for airfares..
Yep.. should be leaving for the uk around august 16th.. should be lots of fun..
Hopefully I'll be meeting a friend up there and go with her to the Leeds festival, which has a few good bands playing.. (and a few not so good ones..)
I really cant wait, its going to be much fun. Much fun indeed.
Ok im out.
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| Milkshake Seizures. |
[19 May 2004|11:26am] |
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Well considering I want that lame as fuck post below to just dissapear and die.. I thought I would update.
Finally got a responce for my THQ job application shit.. emails back and forth.. and what not...
So now I'm expecting a call form the dude soon.. to discuss it further... man.. I hate business phone calls..
But anyway.. hopefully it will be good and he wont ask me scary questions.
And if you dont know what thq is, www.thq.co.uk except the australian version.
I'd probably be working on concept art, and storyboards.. and.. hmm.. maybe textures who the fuck knows...
I updated my site recently with a new section for all you perverts out there:
http://www.martinabel.com/html/adult.htm
Its a collection of the better picture magazine illustrations ive done.. I thought it was about time I actually showed them.. I think theres about 21 in all...
Red is a fan tho, he reads them at work, and I found that pretty humerous.
Apart from that hmm... well I updated Angry Pants.. my little webcomic. http://www.bigcheeseproductions.com (click on the button)
The content is pretty random and shit.. but it had been a year since I updated it so fuck you's all, you get what you are given heheh.... I should update again soon with something thats actually slightly humerous.. I was thinking of Spank killing guy sebastion with a spoon.. wattaya think??
I hope you realise I should be working right now.. I havent even showered. WHAT A DING BAT,
Moving along.....
I bought Matrix Revolutions on DVD.. in a spontaneous shopping spree. Most people Hate it.. I like it. I like them all. Godamnit. Cant wait for the matrix online.
What else.... Went and saw Diks Misfits cover band at DV8... and stupid me Ive forgot there fucking name.. but anyway.. it was good... needed more guitar... sound was a little shoddy but they played well... and then Charter 77 played and by that stage i was a drunk bitch, so I danced.. or... fell over in the motion of dancing... which was enjoyable..
And then godforbid I landed in the 80's room with chris.. and thats just never a good fucking idea.. but it always seems like a good idea when you are fucked off your head, so we danced like absolute twats and it was humerous. At least, I didnt spew in the pool room this time.. thats a bonus.
Then we all jumped in Bens TURBO, and he drove jim, and joel and myself a lift back to frangatown.. which was very nice of you ben! Thanks champ, I hope ur lung gets better.
And then I slept.
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[05 May 2004|12:01am] |
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I am so ubelievabley sad right now... I dont think words casn describe it... I mean im writing this is livejournal for fucks sake.. i dont know whats sad if that isnt....
oh ... man....
what a pile of shit
we call
life.
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[04 May 2004|08:34pm] |
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Hmm so what to say.
I'm feeling pretty shit at the moment... but I'm not sure if I should right about it.. it would be completely emo. and lame..
But oh well.. whatever....
I have this bottle to keep me comfort.. down south.. southern comfort get it? Ok, so Im not a comedian. Shut the fuck up.
I have one thing to say.
Milkshake seizures....
bring em on.
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[24 Apr 2004|10:16pm] |
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She knew everything. Im so confused.
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| boobs. |
[22 Apr 2004|05:10pm] |
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Just so you know what I draw three times a week.
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| *melt* |
[22 Apr 2004|12:12pm] |
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Thought I might update... mainly coz I was sick of looking at that xbox illo.
Well last friday I went up to the city to grab a few comics, one of which was Dead@17: Blood of Saints #1 ... which has my pinup/advertisment in it! WOOT.
I was pretty impressed with the quality print, those Viper guys fucking do a nice job. So anyway finally my art was featured in a comic shop.. and I just melted right there..
I bought 3 copies.. im such a goose. Hmm.. but yeh its good to see my dream starting to come true.. and gee its only taken 7 years.
I got the script yesterday for the 'anthology' , if you dont know what im talking about.. well.. the pinup i mentioned before, was to advertise this book. 48 pages, 5 stories. 5 artists.. me one of them. Its goind to be rad. Story was a little different than what I expected but its all good.. Im gunna work my arse off.
So anyway, the plan is, I do some impressive shit in this short story and they give me my own title. Thats the plan anyway. they are looking for someone out of us 5... so if that happens.. dream come true.
Anyway. Its official. Ive booked my appointment for Saturday, 10 am. ... To see a psychic that is. I cant wait. I had a tarot reading done a few weeks ago, and it was pretty accurate..
Anyway theres some shit I wanna know.. and I also wanna know if its legitimate. But, we'll see.
I should totally be doing work right now. Im getting pretty over drawing all this smut. Moneys good but its so draining.
OK, back to it.
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